I’ve *never* been successful explaining poly using the parents/children analogy. Some poly folks seem to understand it, but others apparently don’t at all.
Marriage is a life partnership. Not all relationships are life partnerships. Does a Christian marriage allow one to have friends? If so, then I see no reason, using *that* argument, why a Christian marriage would not allow one to be poly — to love one’s friends, to have loving
non-marriage relationships with other people.
I’m not Christian, but I was raised as one, and I found myself thinking the other day about Jesus’ words “And the greatest of these is love” in a poly context. Poly has helped show me that underneath all the different names for love and the different ways it feels in different relationships, love is just love.
One of the thorniest arguments my partner and I had early on in our relationship concerned our different understandings of love. I urge you both to persist in sorting yours out, because when you can understand each other’s views of love, you have really gotten somewhere.
Bonus: How Do You Explain Polyamory To Someone Who’s Monogamous?
“You have more than one friend, right? You care about your friends, right?
Your friends all know that you have more than one friend, right? You
don’t have big trouble juggling several friends, right? You find time to
spend with each of them? OK, well, polyamory is like having several
friends that you love and have sex with.”
That’s a start, anyway. People can say “Well, *I* couldn’t do that with
lovers,” but at least they have an example from their own lives that they
can start from.